I am behind with my blog entries from the road. For now, this is about a different kind of journey.Dear Senator Ferguson:
I am writing as a resident of District 46 to thank you for your leadership in sponsoring SB 116, the Maryland Religious Freedom and Civil Marriage Protection Act. It is an important step forward for Maryland and I am hopeful it will soon become the law of our state.
To underscore how important this legislation is, I would like to add a personal perspective. All too often in this continuing and contentious debate over same sex marriage, gay Americans are reduced to ridiculous caricatures of predatory individuals with dubious morals seeking to force some sort of dangerous agenda on an unwilling majority. We, in fact, have no agenda and do not want to impact anyone else's marriages or families or lives. We are simply fighting for equal treatment for our relationships and families and lives. And, your effort has the potential to have real, permanent and positive impact on Marylanders.
I grew up in the much less tolerant state of Florida, the son of devout Catholics; my father was a tough Irish cop from Providence, Rhode Island. My parents loved me, but I had plenty of negative messages growing up that reinforced my own self-view that being gay was a terrible character flaw. It was not until I turned 40 that I came to accept that I could never change my orientation, it is not a character flaw, and self-hatred was a huge waste of time.
So, I stopped. Today, I accept that I am an imperfect, but hard-working, law-abiding, tax-paying citizen of the State of Maryland. I am an accomplished and respected lawyer serving the U.S. Government in Washington D.C. and a member of the Maryland Bar. My partner, who grew up on a farm in the Great Plains, is a licensed Maryland physician who specializes in community psychiatry. What that means is that he spends his days helping chronically mental ill Marylanders who mostly have no money. At home, we are busy with the demands of raising a nearly 10-year-old son. He is a happy, healthy 4th grader doing well in school who loves his dog, pet lizard, and who is obsessed with Legos. We're hard at work - just like every other parent - trying to raise an educated, respectful and productive citizen of this state and country. So, our "agenda" is to be good professionals, good parents and good citizens. We just want our family to be treated the same under the law as every other family.
We have chosen to make our professional and personal home in Maryland because of all this state has to offer. But, we would like for everyone to be able to take the same step in Maryland that we took in the Commonwealth of Massachusetts in 2009, when we were married on the campus of my alma mater, Boston University. In Massachusetts, marriage equality is nearly 6 years old. And, when we arrived at the City of Boston Clerk's office to apply for our marriage license, the only reaction we encountered was the same response as every other couple (all straight) in line: "Use blue ink, $50 cash only." I was really happy to be treated as indifferently as every other marriage license applicant that day.
Thank you again for your support of fairness and equality.
Finally, I thought you might like to see a video clip of an impressive University of Iowa student speaking about the experience of being raised by two women, just before the Iowa House took a disappointing step backward from equality.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?
Sincerely,
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